venting about depression, fomo, and partner jealous ig
boyfriend gets rly jealous and stressed/overwhelmed when i hang out with him with a specific one of his friends, who is kind of a lot by himself anyway, so we avoid it nowwhich is fine and stuff, but today when they pulled up to get his mail, his friend excitedly told me about the stuff the renaissance fair they were going to tomorrow would be (with the assumption that of course I’d wanna join cuz that’s as and fuck and ive never been)
and so i had to turn it down alongside my bf and act like i wouldnt fucking love to leave the constant isolation of my house and rarely ever getting to see the one of my friends that’s not online to go and see the coolest new shit with people i like
and like I don’t resent my boyfriend for it, i was just feeling sensitive (from getting yelled at a lot today anyway) and it makes me sad i can’t go :,,,,(
obviously it’s worth my beloved’s happiness, but it still stings.
plus i hope the sweet friend who went out of his way to include me doesn’t think my bad obviously made-up excuses are because i don’t like him, cuz i do, i just can’t.
sux.